We often think about gratitude around Thanksgiving.  Many of us have heard or experienced that gratitude makes us happier.  Why?  Why does gratitude make us happier?

Gratitude Improves Your Health and Happiness

Over the past ten years, studies have repeatedly shown how gratitude improves both physical and emotional health.  Dr. Robert Emmons, the leading expert on gratitude and author of the book, THANKS! How the New Science of Gratitude Can Make You Happier, lists a number of specific health benefits he has observed in grateful people. They enjoy lower blood pressure, less pain, more energy, better sleep, stronger immune systems, and even a longer life. Studies show that grateful people are happier, experience less depression, higher self-esteem, feel less lonely, and are more likely to help others—which draws others closer to the people they help.

How Does Gratitude Make Us Happier and Healthier?

Knowing that gratitude makes us happy is helpful because it motivates us to be more grateful.  However understanding HOW gratitude helps us be happier can be even more motivating.   This will be a behind-the-scenes look at what science shows us happens to our brains when we are grateful.

Gratitude Changes the Chemistry of the Brain

Our thoughts actually stimulate various neurotransmitters in the brain which in turn create our feelings.  When we change what we are thinking, we change our feelings. Studies show that grateful thoughts cause the brain to produce more neurotransmitters of serotonin and dopamine. Seratonin is known as the “happy” hormone and lower levels of it are associated with depression.  Dopamine is the neurotransmitter that is responsible for causing us to seek out rewards…to eat, to connect with others etc.  The more dopamine we have the more likely we are to create happiness in our lives.  It’s powerful to realize that simply by deliberately placing thoughts in our brain about what we are thankful for, we can change our neurochemistry and shift it to happiness.

Dr. Robert Emmons, a psychologist at UC Davis and the author of the book, THANKS! How the New Science of Gratitude Can Make You Happier, did a study with individuals.  He asked 1/3 of them to write down daily what they were thankful for.  He asked 1/3 to write down things that irritated them. And, the last 1/3 could write down whatever they wanted each day.  After 8 weeks, he found that those who wrote down things they were thankful for were significantly happier.  Those who write down things that irritated them were less happy and those who wrote down whatever they wanted didn’t show a significant change in happiness.

Gratitude Helps Us Notice What We Take for Granted

It’s estimated that there is over 40,000 bit of data available to our brains at any one moment.  Just talking to someone takes up 2,000 bits and our brains can only process about 4,000 bits.   Since the brain can’t accommodate all the information available to us, it filters out information that seems irrelevant.  This is good—it helps us survive!  However, knowing this can also help us improve our happiness. We tend to filter out and not notice some of the things that actually mean a lot to us.  We take them for granted.  Gratitude simply brings our awareness of these important things back to the surface.  Thinking about them increases our happiness because it magnifies an authentic feeling we have and have shelved for efficiency’s sake.

Recently I got a new watch. I was so excited to open the box when it arrived.  It was even more beautiful in person than I had imagined looking at it on-line.  I was excited to put it on the next day. Every time I looked at it, it made me happy.  I felt grateful for the new watch.  But each day I noticed the watch a little bit less—it was a bit less novel to me and eventually it was just something I put on.  It didn’t bring me the same joy each time I looked at it.

Studies show that gratitude can re-create some of the same thoughts and feelings I had as when my watch was novel.  Simply by thinking about my watch and feeling thankful for it.  So, today each time I’ve looked at my watch I have been thinking about how grateful I am for it.  This simple act has made me smile several times.

Gratitude Changes the Way We See Everything

When you notice and express things you appreciate in others, you like them more.  It changes the internal story you have about that person in your head.  Even if it wasn’t negative to begin with, it changes the story we have about the other person.

Before bed we gather as a family and say a prayer.  We were having an issue with people whining about prayer, not wanting to be the one to say, poking each other etc.  A few months ago, our family started a new evening tradition. When we gather together we all take just a minute to mention something we’re grateful for about the person who says the prayer.  It can be a quality we admire, or something we noticed or appreciated that week.  Here are some of the ways it has changed the way we see things.

It Changes the Way We See Situations

This simple practice has transformed our family gathering.  There is no more whining about who says the prayer. We don’t have much poking or rolling around anymore.  Everyone perks up when it’s time to pray–probably because it’s created a positive feeling each night when it’s time to share things we love about each other.

It Changes the Way We See Ourselves

Each of us look forward to our day to say the prayer when we are “emotionally flooded” with appreciation.  It’s a moment we feel loved by the people we love most and we feel more connected to them. We feel differently about ourselves. When others notice good things in us, it’s easier to see them ourselves.

It Changes the Way We See Others

Even better, it has made a difference in the way we feel about each other.  I love getting a chance to verbalize what I appreciate about my husband and my kids. Expressing it out loud makes me feel more love for them.

We can change the way we feel about others simply by thinking grateful thoughts or writing them down.  But for a truly transformative experience, express thanks verbally to the person.  Science shows this causes happiness scores to skyrocket.

This is a short video that shows the transformative power of gratitude in about 7 min. simply from expressing thanks to others.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHv6vTKD6lg

Cultivating Gratitude

1.  How happy would you rate yourself on a scale of 1-10?
2.  Write down what you are grateful for each night for 1 week or express gratitude to someone who has influenced your life by writing or in person.
3.  Re-rate yourself.  How happy are you on a scale of 1-10?